A Gentle Quiet Whisper

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Two weeks from now i will be in South Carolina - house hunting...job hunting. Moving. Part of me looks forward with great anticipation to the new challenges and opportunities that lay on the horizon - as BM said, "Your future is in front of you!" How exciting! I have a journeying heart and i enjoy adventures...Yet i am finding my roots have gotten deeper here in my present home and pulling them up is beginning to cause some pain and a little anxiety.

I confess, i have moments when i look around me and say, "what am i doing!" Things are going pretty well here, i feel secure here and quite comfortable...yet, i am following a call in my heart that has been there for a long time. I am stepping out into a new trail - one i have been eyeing since i was young. The Calling i believe God designed for me.

So inbetween exhilarating emotions that nearly make me want to fly to SC right now and a maternal pull to stay put, not wanting to uproot...i am learning to be still and listen for His assuring voice.

Last night i went to bed with many mixed emotions. The weekend was wonderfully relaxing, i got some packing done and a few good cups of tea and a book and a few naps...and good rich fellowship. My heart was full and rested. I also had thoughts of "where am i going to live? where should i work? where should i look? rent or buy? should i buy that computer i need now? what kind? what will my finances look like?" To say the least, these questions get my heart pumping and i begin to get nervous...decisions are so hard sometimes! I even had a few thoughts about my current students...i never expected to love this position so much and enjoy teaching in this school - that has caught me by surprise...should i stay?

So my mind rocked back and forth with these ferocious thoughts...as i crawled onto my air mattress...i prayed, "Oh Lord, show me what You want me to do, illuminate each step to me...and calm me down!" As sub-conscious sleep came...a familiar calm fell upon my being. Steady now, Tammie....I am here, remember what I have called you to do.

This morning, my devotions took me to the story of Elijah, in the cave...and the still quiet voice of the Lord. Be Still...and Know i am God. Actually, all weekend, i heard Him whisper to me several times...Trust Me, watch what I will do for you...I am Big, Trust me...will you? Utter, naked dependance....

He met me. I rejoiced all the way to work, bursting with happiness that HE had met me....again! His gentle quiet whisper: Be still...and know!

Comments

Bev said…
Wow, thank you for this blog. I really needed it. Not really sure how I found you, but I guess God guided my steps to you. I read a couple of your recent blogs. You are quiet an inspiration to me. I would like to be more bold in my faith. You have set a great example for me. Good luck and 'yes' God will guide you to the perfect place at the perfect time in His perfect plan.
Bev
May 27, 2008 at 5:01 PM
Melanie said…
Tammie ~ hang in there! Moving on is so difficult. I think the hardest time for me was when I had to leave LDM and come here when I first got married. I understand the ache, and loss you may feel. Just remember..it isn't the end..there is great things in store for you!! It is better to obey..I am sure if you stay here..after feeling that peace to leave..it would be miserable!!
May 28, 2008 at 7:39 AM
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